The locations were quite different, but the experiences were the same. The first visit was in Seoul, and, being the country's capital, the entire building down to the aglets on the nurses was pristine, glistening, and impressive. It was the type of hospital medical practitioners could be proud of, and it shone with cleanliness.
The one in Geoje looked like the psych ward from a horror movie.
Oh yes. I feel healthier just being here.
Both hospitals shared the same procedures, though. Differently between them, the Seoul hospital had us don sterilized ninja gis, and the Geoje branch took my measurements while I was wearing a loose dress shirt, so I'm sure they're a bit innacurate. The primarily similar method that you are exposed to is that you are sent to stations with one or two nurses (wo)manning each, and you're shuffled back and forth across them all depending on which station is available, and you will be confused for other foreigners because we all look the same.
The other shared factor is that you're kidding yourself if you think they have English staff. They know enough English to do their jobs, but not to address your concerns. At the first visit, I had to get an electrokardiogram. I've never had an EKG, so I just wanted to know what to expect. The nurse told me to close my eyes, and not to be nervous, so I did as I was asked. But while lying down with my eyes closed, I tried asking if I would feel a stinging, or an electric pulse, or anything. Her response was 'close your eyes, don't be nervous.' I tried insisting 'no, no I'm not nervous, I just want to kno-' which was interrupted with 'don't be nervous'. At this point I was starting to get nervous, considering the nurse wouldn't answer my questions, and was holding me down on the table while she smeared jelly all over my exposed chest and told me 'not to be nervous' and 'close your eyes' over and over again. Eventually we made it through foreplay and the EKG, but she never did address my concerns.
The other shared factor is that you're kidding yourself if you think they have English staff. They know enough English to do their jobs, but not to address your concerns. At the first visit, I had to get an electrokardiogram. I've never had an EKG, so I just wanted to know what to expect. The nurse told me to close my eyes, and not to be nervous, so I did as I was asked. But while lying down with my eyes closed, I tried asking if I would feel a stinging, or an electric pulse, or anything. Her response was 'close your eyes, don't be nervous.' I tried insisting 'no, no I'm not nervous, I just want to kno-' which was interrupted with 'don't be nervous'. At this point I was starting to get nervous, considering the nurse wouldn't answer my questions, and was holding me down on the table while she smeared jelly all over my exposed chest and told me 'not to be nervous' and 'close your eyes' over and over again. Eventually we made it through foreplay and the EKG, but she never did address my concerns.
The Seoul hospital had a dental section which used a small camera and monitor (and the only Korean on staff who could speak fluent English) to show you how disgusting your teeth were. I left feeling as though my mouth were trying to kill me from the inside out, despite getting a decent bill of health.
This site also had the 'head doctors' on staff, whose job it was to pull you in, ask you questions that you had previously answered on your forms, and sign off on you giving what sounded like similar answers. Keep in mind that the only English speaking staff were in the dental ward, and understand that the two interviews we were forced through were probably the most unpleasant of the experiences in the process.
This site also had the 'head doctors' on staff, whose job it was to pull you in, ask you questions that you had previously answered on your forms, and sign off on you giving what sounded like similar answers. Keep in mind that the only English speaking staff were in the dental ward, and understand that the two interviews we were forced through were probably the most unpleasant of the experiences in the process.
The urine test was also trying at both branches. To admit a personal fact to the internet, I have a shy bladder in the first place, and although it tends to go away with the introduction of alcohol in my system, the hospital didn't seem to approve of this method. Something about 'skewing the results'. It was a non-issue in the Seoul test, although it took some careful hand eye coordination to be able to fill the test tube they gave us for the task. At the Geoje hospital, however, I hadn't really drank any fluids for the day, and having a room full of people cheer you in does no help in this particular task.
The Geoje hospital more than made up for it with the best blood draw I've ever gotten. I quite actually felt nothing as the nurse pierced my skin with the needle, and I feel I'd have a much better relationship with them if this replaced my earliest memory of getting a shot where I had three nurses holding me down while I screamed.
In the end, I received an A+ to my health (as far as I know) both times and happily survived both incidents. Which is good to know, because medical expenses are far cheaper in Korea than they are in the states, so any optional dentistry, optometry, or more complicated procedures are easily done an a quarter or less of the budget, so once the money starts flowing in more steadily, I foresee corrective health operation rooms as my second home.
Gonna come back home healthy as two horses stapled together.
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